Forgiveness is difficult. Let’s just get that out there. It isn’t for the weak, it is an attribute of the strong. Somehow we have gotten it into our heads that if we are good, spiritual people that forgiveness should be easy. That is should occur naturally as expressions of our enlightenment or “goodness” and when people spit in our faces instead of spitting back, we bow and say, “Namaste”. No, that has not been my experience and I have, like everyone else, have had some major things to forgive in my life.
Forgiveness is a process. It can’t be rushed, you must work for it. It doesn’t just happen magically and forcing it doesn’t necessary mean you have truly forgiven. True forgiveness feels like this to me: when I think of the person who hurt me, I feel light in my heart, I feel no pang of bitterness or resentfulness. I wish them peace. I feel peaceful. It’s what I call the “acid test.” Do you need to pop a Tums when you think of the person in question? Yes? You aren’t there yet.